Clint Eastwood Youth Program - CEYP Newsletter
Issue 26: Focus on family - Treatment that works
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“But they don’t even want
to be seen in public with me!”
As children move into adolescence and begin to feel more comfortable by themselves and with friends, parents may start feeling they aren’t needed or wanted, except perhaps to buy things and provide transportation. Even though it is typically the adolescents who are withdrawing, they may feel abandoned when their parents pull back in response. Don’t pull too far back. Teenagers need adults involved in their lives. They still need help learning how to do things, thinking about things, and problem-solving; they need attention, help when there is a problem, and to know there is a “safety net.”
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While tension between parents and adolescents may be predictable, the family is still one of the most effective ways to promote values and success in school, work, and relationships.
As a parent, you want what’s best for your kids. But figuring out what they need and how to help them get it can be a daunting task. When there is mental illness, substance abuse problem, or behavior problem with a child or adolescent, the entire family is affected, which adds another level of difficulty to the family dynamic.
Successful adolescents often have a positive, supportive, honest relationship with their parents. Family, when it works, serves as a place of comfort, a sort of “home base”; it is a place to test out behaviors, to be at your worst and know you will still be loved, cared for, and supported when you need help.
New evidence supports the value of family therapy in addressing and dealing with many mental/ emotional and substance abuse issues experienced by adolescents. This makes sense; one family member’s problems affect and are affected by the other members of the family.
Behavior does not happen in a vacuum
When an adolescent experiences depression, anxiety, substance abuse, or other mental illness, therapy is often suggested. Because therapy is sought to “fix” the teen and to stop the behavior he or she is displaying, many parents are surprised when the therapist suggests family therapy.
Family therapy may be an essential part of treatment for many adolescent problems. It is one way to help both the child and the parents understand why the adolescent acts out with difficult, dangerous, or high-risk behavior and to help a troubled teen learn to manage often-confusing feelings and express his or her needs in a healthy, effective way.
Family therapy also helps the family learn ways to interact more effectively and to strengthen and improve their relationships. The family can discover ways to help their teen gain a better understanding of adolescent behavior and of mental illness. This improves the chances of the family “recovery.”
Finding the answer
If your teen is “acting out,” using drugs and/or alcohol, “cutting,” changing friends, losing ground at school, or otherwise giving you cause for concern, get an evaluation by a qualified therapist or psychiatrist. The Clint Eastwood Youth Program treats not only the adolescent, it treats the entire family. We’re here to help.