Just breathe...

It has become tradition. Four steadfast friends gathering every Thursday in Salinas. We say it’s to watch the latest episode of Survivor, but we women always know it’s much more than that.

Sometimes we make dinner. Sometimes we settle for popcorn. Always, there’s chocolate. But more importantly, it’s the four of us. Four friends finding the time for each other in a world filled with burgeoning day planners, barrages of e-mail, and barely enough stamina to get up and do it all again tomorrow.

We have had ourselves a year, these friends and I. Grandma broke her hip. Mom threw out her back again. The baby wouldn’t sleep. One sister turned 40. And the four of us endured things we never thought imaginable.

But, you know what? We did it. We’re doing it. And it is spring, after all.

Grandma is healing. Mom is on the mend. The baby slumbers through the night. That sister is finding that 40 isn’t fatal. And it’s actually looking as if the four of us are going to outlast the onslaught.

What are friends for?

The mightiest comrade perhaps is one of our Thursday quartet, our resident phoenix if you will.

She was diagnosed with breast cancer in September. It happens to 1 in 8 women, they say. For us, it’s 1 in 4. She lost part of her body. She lost her hair. She definitely lost her appetite. But, by God, she will never lose her style.

I thought I knew her well. But now I marvel at her unparalleled grace and inherent joy. She shoved her fear underneath scarves and caps and even wigs. She spent three months in chemotherapy. She took care of her mother. She counseled her friends. And she just boldly weathered two months — every single day — of radiation. We’ve barely seen her flinch. We’ve rarely been so blessed.

This woman has taught us what truly matters — or at least refreshed our memories. She has redefined poise. She has taken us to the most terrifying ledge and shown us that it comes with an amazing view.

She is our friend, our inspiration, and unequivocally our favorite survivor.